Children who grow up in invalidating environments that discredit their personal interest, denies meeting their needs and disregards what is important to them, tend to have difficulty later in life regulating emotions when it comes to dealing with disappointment. "Triggers" develop around hot issues that remind them of the burn of past unmet needs…triggers keep haunts from their past alive. Abandonment issues are especially powerful triggers. The person may develop neurotic behaviors surrounding anything they even perceive as a hint of potential abandonment, deception or betrayal. They may split off from an initial view they had of a person they once trusted and believed to be honorable. But, once that person falls from grace – splitting begins – and now the other person is viewed as their mortal enemy who they must protect themselves from at all costs. This may or may not be reality, but whether imagined or real, the borderline personality will react with a fight or flight response. Rarely do they freeze. They will take action and lash out or flee and lash in. Self harm becomes a punishing distraction over severe frustration and unmet needs. They are doing their best to protect themselves from misfortune and distract themselves from suffering, but their effort is often in vain. The reactive emotional state of the borderline often becomes the scapegoat where pre-existing problems go unresolved. Although the rage and anger is a response to pre existing problems, violence <b>…</b>
Source: YouTube